As a young child, the kinds of things that run through your mind with regards to your future are the physical things- how much money you will make, the kind of car you’ll drive and the husband who’s going to sweep you off your feet and with whom you’ll live happily ever after (just like the storybooks). As such, whenever I was asked what I wanted to be, the answer was a teacher. I loved grading papers and played pretend school with my doll babies. I had dreams of making top dollars and come home to my prince charming in my very own dream house. After all, I was going to be the modern day Barbie!
So where am I in the scheme of things? I have become a teacher and I am driving a nice ride. I’ve also had the privilege of advancing career wise, obtaining both a Bachelor and Master’s degree before the age of 30. I have the student loans to prove it! (Insert laugh) Although I don’t have my “dream” house yet, I am living comfortably in my one bedroom apartment, of which I am in the process of redecorating! My Ken also hasn’t come yet, but I believe that the next relationship that I enter in will be it. I can honestly say that I am glad that Ken hadn’t entered my life sooner, because I wasn’t in a place to even recognize him. As the saying goes, “Be the kind of person you want to meet”, and I had to own to up to that. I was so busy working on the stuff on the outside that I failed to address what was going on on the inside which is equally important in your journey of self-discovery. It’s the totality of the whole person that really matters in the scheme of things. Furthermore, you must strive to be complete in all areas of life.
Prior to digging deep and looking at myself square in the eye, I found out that I was emotionally and spiritually bankrupt!! Finding that out was both devastating and life changing because although I wasn’t where I wanted to be as far as money and relationship wise, I had a great opportunity to get stronger in areas that I had once disregarded as unimportant…and so the process began.
Today, at the age of 33, I stand a young woman is confident, vibrant and fearless. Through life’s journey, I’ve learned that it is imperative to work from the inside out as opposed to the outside in. So to answer the question…Am I where I thought I would be? No, I am a lot farther than I could have ever imagined and this is just the beginning!