“If I could just lose this love handle, then I’ll be fine”…
“I need to lose 15 pounds, then I’ll feel better”…
“I hate my stomach…”
Admit it and be honest. At one time or another you have said something like this about yourself at least once in your life or perhaps you thought you could never compare to one of the models in a magazine. Well if you won’t tell the truth, I will because it’s time to expose this monster of low esteem and negative body image!
Truthfully these are just some of the things I used to say about myself. Whenever I would get into conversations with my friends or peers, the self-loathing would begin. I would criticize this body part because it was too big, or that body part because it was too small…and so the cycle continued. It is truly a vicious cycle that is so damaging to the human psyche. I mean who said just because I’m plus size that I must have low self-esteem? Who said that plus size women aren’t beautiful? Where did this misnomer come from?
For so long I believed the lies, hiding behind big clothes to make myself invisible. I never felt good enough or cute enough. My thoughts were all negative and it was pure madness! If I continued to look at society and their definition of “true beauty”, I might as well have crawled under a rock and stay or the rock fall on me. Unfortunately, society has not totally embraced diversity with respect to the plus size community, and rather than wait for them, I decided to be proactive.
NO MATTER HOW MUCH I PUT INTO MY OUTER APPEARANCE, CHANGE DIDN’T TAKE PLACE UNTIL I CHANGED WHAT I THOUGHT ABOUT ME.
At that point, something happened. I had taken my power back. At that moment, I was Popeye right after he had eaten his spinach! I decided to look in the mirror and point out what I liked about my body. I was grateful to have my size double digit feet. (Nine West became my best friend!) I learned to appreciate my jiggly arms and non-flat stomach. My chubby cheeks helped form the biggest smile ever. I began to love me…I mean truly love me! It was so freeing, fun and filled with ‘fabulosity’! From that point on, it was no turning back. Instead of speaking negative, I decided to speak life and words of encouragement over myself. Once I embraced every flaw and every imperfection, I flipped the script. It’s as if the blinders were removed from my eyes and I saw myself for the beautiful young lady who I was created to be!
Today I am a young woman who has embraced her flaws and imperfections. I love life now more than ever. I smile more, and it is truly from the inside. As quiet as it’s kept, weight loss is NOT the anecdote for low self-esteem.
So ladies, if you are like the old me, TODAY, IN THIS MOMENT learn to love you! Listed below are a few of life’s lessons that I learned on my journey to self-discovery.
· Find out who you are and do some soul searching and be honest about it.
· Keep a daily journal.
· Refuse at all costs to allow anyone to dictate how you should feel about you.
· Spend quality time with yourself.
· Treat yourself how you would want someone else to treat you.
By practicing these tips each day, you will become empowered. Know that you are beautiful! Own it! “Chin up – you have a reason to smile!” There are millions of girls all over the world looking for examples of confident curvy chicas…I challenge you to be one!